Big Boy Bed? Um, No thanks…

So, after the lovely night that I described in my previous post – I got an even more fun experience the next night. He woke up at 2:15 and, determined not be suckered this time, I checked him, tucked him in, told him to go to sleep, and went back to bed.

He screamed for me and over the monitor I hear this, “Mooooooomy, Mooooooomy!!!! Oooo, uuugh, oooo, SMACK! -door opens-, I’m COOOOOOMMMMMMIN!” and then I open my eyes to see Brady standing in front of me in my room! I cracked up at the time. It was so cute and funny! But when he proceeded to stay awake for the next 4 and a half – yes FOUR AND A HALF! hours. It ceased to be cute or funny very quickly.  I even tried putting him back in his crib once and he climbed back out in a second.

So after that super night, my in-laws took him on Saturday and I relaxed a bit and got a good night’s sleep – THANK GOD! Because on Sunday I had Brady demonstrate his escape skills in front of me and quickly determined that it was not safe at all! My father-in-law and I took apart the crib and I made Brady a bed on the floor with his crib mattress and blankets.

It’s been rough to say the least. I’m having flashbacks to having a newborn with the amount of sleep I’ve been getting. Although the husband returned from his trip on Monday night, he’s still been working super long hours. Brady finally went to sleep at a decent hour in his own bed last night and stayed there all night! A major victory! But he did wake up for a few hours in the middle there which totally blew.

And although I didn’t expect it, his climbing out of the crib and getting a “big boy bed” have hit me hard. I’m missing my baby. Where in the world did he go? And who is this little boy who’s living with me? He even undressed himself before his bath last night and only needed a little help getting the shirt over his head. He’s growing up!

His real “big boy bed” should arrive next week and we’ve been trying to get him excited about it, even if I’m really not.

My big boy in his big big bed!

Blah

Although my last post claims that I had found some perspective, I am still going to complain. Despite my efforts to remind myself that people have it worse than me in the world – I was still miserable lying there with my wide-awake 2-year-old between 4 and 6:30 this morning. I don’t deal well with situations I have zero control over or with not getting enough sleep and being exhausted while my child lies there wide awake for absolutely no discernible reason is probably tops on my list of least favorite things.

The husband is away for work until Monday night and I’m super-duper lucky to have my in-laws close so I’ll get a break on Saturday night, but it still really weighs on me to be on my own with Brady. Some moms do this all the time, some do it every week, and a lot of them do it with a lot more grace than I do. I have never been a person who did well with being alone. I didn’t even like having my own room for the one year in college that I did. I like having someone else to back me up and I thrive on that partnership, so aside from being the sole kid-keeper while hubby is away, I also feel adrift just because he isn’t here.

So I’m just gonna have to suck it up, be the mama, and get through till Monday night.

I wish he was doing this last night!

Gaining some perspective

I’ve been a little bummed  about some upcoming work changes – I’ll no longer be able to go into the office to work on a regular basis. The project I’ve been working on is coming to an end, which I knew, but due to some changes in the company I’ll have to work from home or Starbucks or the library or figure something out for the new jobs I’m getting.

I’ve been very, very happy these last few months with my work/home split so I’m sad to see that come to an end. I’m trying to use this as a new beginning and to figure out what it is I actually want to be doing with my time. But my head is feeling muddled and it’s hard to break free and actually think some clear thoughts on the subject.

While I was feeling sorry for myself and trying to think, an earthquake hit Haiti – a country that really didn’t need any additional problems. At the moment I’m just feeling very thankful that my family has a home and food and clean drinking water. Since becoming a mother it seems that I’ve developed a stronger sense of sympathy. I just cannot imagine not being able to help my baby in a situation like that. It breaks my heart.

I’m sure everyone has already heard, but one of the easiest ways to give to those people who need so much right now is by texting.

To donate $10 to the American Redcross text HAITI to 90999.

To donate $5 to Wyclef Jean’s Haiti Earthquake Fund text YELE to 501501

Roadhouse!

The other night the husband and the boy were watching Family Guy. Don’t worry, he fast forwards any bad language or really inappropriate things. Anyway, they were watching and saw this…

Which Brady thought was hilarious and now I get to be entertained by this

Awesome!

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Ours were very merry and very happy! I hope yours were too!!!

I hate letting the blog go so long, but we’ve only been home for 3 days of the last 2 weeks so it’s been tough. First we went to Pittsburgh and stayed with my mom for Christmas. We had a great time with my family and friends and Brady loved it.

Then we were home from Monday afternoon until Thursday afternoon when we went up to my sister-in-law’s place upstate. We ate lots of food, went sledding, and even visited some cows!

Now we’re finally home and spent the day rearranging Brady’s room to accommodate all of his new toys!

Christmas at Grandma's!

Happy New Year Spaghetti

Sledding!

I hear the secrets that you keep…

when you’re singing in your sleep.

Here is a perfect, crystallized example of the give and take of parenthood.

This morning, Brady woke up at 5 for some unknown reason. He doesn’t do it often and usually when he wakes in the night I go in and cover him up or whatever and he’s fine. But this morning he was standing up and flipping out. It was cold in his room and he wouldn’t lay back down, so I picked him up and brought him to bed with me.

He went right back to sleep, but he’s a very restless, twitchy sleeper so I never really got back to sleep myself. At some point during the morning he started singing the goodbye song from our swim class…”We’re gonna clap our hands and say goodbye, we’re gonna clap our hands and say goodbye…” and clapping his hands.

I shushed him to go back to sleep, but when I looked over at him his eyes were closed and after those two lines he didn’t make a peep. He was asleep the whole time! It was too precious and it’s been making me smile all day long. That one little thing made the loss of sleep 100% worth it!

WAHM

This week I’ve been a work-at-home mom…and I’ve HATED it! Like I’ve said before, I really have an ideal situation where I get a bit of both worlds. I work sometimes and I stay home sometimes and nary the two shall meet (for the most part, I definitely work on my at-home days, but not like this). Until this week. My mother-in-law had to be home while her upstairs is being painted. Normally this wouldn’t be a big deal. I like having the odd bunch of time to myself with my little pickle.

But, I committed to a pretty heavy duty project that is in the thick of things right now. It doesn’t go away just because I have no childcare this week. It just keeps going and going. Trying to get actual work done with a two-year-old in a one bedroom apartment is an act of futility.

I’ve mostly been working every second he’s otherwise occupied (and right now I’m taking a break to write this before I lose my mind). I work while he plays on the playground or colors or watches a show. I work while he naps and after he goes to sleep. I work while he concentrates on eating a popsicle. I work as he pulls on my hand saying “Mommy, get down. Get down off your chair. Get down now and COME WITH ME!!!”

I know some people love this kind of life – the kind where you don’t get one second to yourself and work constantly – but I am not one of them. I like some downtime. And when a good majority of your work is tending to a small child you really and truly need it. Kids are EXHAUSTING! At least my kid is.

In this liberated, feminated world we live in with choices of all kinds I have definitely found my least favorite option – working from home with no childcare and a toddler! It sucks!

At least I got hang out with this cute face all week!

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Just wanted to say Happy Thanksgiving! We went over to the parade this morning for a bit. Brady loved the balloons, but not the crowds, so we only stayed for a half hour, but it was fun! I think his favorite part was the low-flying helicopter that went by!

Waiting for it to start with a pretzel

Balloons!

Bye Kermit!

Birthday madness

So the  extended “Brady turns two” celebration has finally come to an end. I think he  enjoyed every second of it. On his birthday he got pancakes for breakfast, some new cars for his trains, a real live fish, cake, and pizza for dinner. He also got a mini party  when my in-laws came over and gave him presents.

Then on Wednesday Grandma (my mom) arrived and let him open presents. The next day my sister got here and he got some more. Then on Sunday he got his big party with his friends and had a blast!

Of course now he expects presents and cake everyday. But I think he’ll get used to not having that. So far the only changes being two has brought is a much later nap. Oddly enough he started taking a 1 or 1:30 nap instead of his usual noon right after his b-day. Weird.

Mmmmmm cake!

Two?!?!

My baby boy is turning 2 this Sunday! In some ways it’s incomprehensible to me. Where did the last 2 years go? It was just yesterday that I was walking around with a big belly all filled up with arms and legs. It seems like just a minute ago that I was overjoyed to see my chubby little baby sitting  up on his own.

Now here he is, two whole years old and a person all his own. He notices things that I never notice and points them out to me. He forms his own ideas about the things that he sees. It dazzles me every single day.

I remember thinking that he would never do anything. That he would just lie there making little baby sounds forever. And then he started to smile…and to giggle…and to play. And from there he just took off. When he turned one last year, I was happy to have that difficult first year behind me, to have moved from being a slave to this little being onto having someone to spend my days with.

This year I find myself a little sad. I always knew I wouldn’t be a parent who didn’t want their child to grown up. I’m proud of each and every thing he learns to do and I’ll continue to be  that way. But I can’t help mourning the loss  of his babyhood. I wonder what happened to that roly poly little ball of chub that I once had.

2007

2008

2009